Warning, it's long (and I had to cut a lot out of it too, like Bandly Feud, just to prevent it being a "And this happened and this happened and this happened" sort of read), but if you want to kill time at work, here's a way of doing so.
A bad day's when I lie in bed and think of things that might have been." - Paul Simon
"But you know, the only thing I've really learned about dealing with gods is that if you make a deal, you keep it. They get to break all the rules they want. We don't." - Neil Gaiman